I practically ran from the living room and into the street

I think my brain is in some sort of shock. It was functioning at such a rate last week that now it’s completely shut down.

I drove to a very quiet place today and sat in the sun for a good 2 hours. Last week there was no room in my head for anything save the buzz and confusion of work. I was hit at all angles by Dad’s health and friend problems and impending weddings, but it all kinda ricocheted off. I felt completely numb.

The crazy mess of noise in my head as at least settled to a dull roar. Actually, for the first time in a long, long time, today for those 2 hours my mind was blank. I was really hoping for an opportunity to try and process what has happened this week, but after about half an hour of trying to force it I just gave up to the quiet. It seemed to work though – the idea of work tomorrow is now intimidating rather than terrifying. I got a few things done this morning that while only being small, means I start on the right page tomorrow rather than behind.

I missed Spanish last week and I have done no revision this week. I am annoyed about that, because as much as on the surface of things I’m unorganised, rarely do I go into something unprepared. I’m really not looking forward to tomorrow night.

Today, though, an impromptu tune from a flute made everything alright with the world. If I remember to appreciate the small things, then with any luck it might be easier to cope with the big stuff.

A note to my tomorrow self: Get Lonely makes a lot more sense when you’re tired, lonely and a little confused.

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