O singer, I don’t believe your song

Dear Glenn,

Firstly, thank you. You clearly got my letter. I got 2 out of 4 possible requests, one of them being Sunstroke House, so a girl ought to be happy with that.

You’d think so, wouldn’t you.

Fact is, I came away from that gig last night with a pretty bad taste in my mouth. I tend to assume the best in people, you know? I tend to hope people will know how to behave and know how to shut the hell up when it matters. Turns out I was a bit wrong in this regard. That crowd last night rivaled the crowd at the now infamous Eels gig I attended at the same venue last year. How can people who pay money to attend a music show clearly dislike and not understand music as much as these people seemed to last night?

My heart swelled when I heard the opening bars of Sunstroke House. What the HELL was that guy doing, trying to (and failing to) clap along in time? How is that a clapalong song? In some crazy alternate universe maybe. It’s such a delicately beautiful song and last night it was massacred.

Also, dude, I gotta say – the fact that you didn’t completely lose it last night staggers me somewhat. I’ve read that you get upset with audiences and I’ve been witness to your onstage outbursts before. Last night I was totally ready for you to walk, particularly during Bottle Baby (BLESS you for playing this by the way) when someone sneezed and a large part of the crowd decided it was the FUNNIEST THING THEY’D EVER HEARD. FFS.

Still, there were highlights. When the crowd shut up Sunstroke House and Men Who Follow Spring the Planet ‘Round were great. Also, Train and Hole in Your Roof almost took the ceiling off the place.

Thanks for trying. Thanks for not walking off. I’m hoping you don’t wait 3 years to release another album, because I really think you need to get the One Crowded Hour monkey off your back. Please don’t despair, because there are who come see you who hang on to every word you say and will keep listening regardless of how many casual listeners dig your single.

Much love,


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