Let the fire take its toll

I’ve had nothing for y’all. Sorry about that.

What I do have right now is a fairly potent combination of tangible disappointment, frustration, and longing. And really, considering the situation, it’s not productive OR fair that I dwell on any of these things. Because sometimes, no matter how many plans you have or how much anticipation you have, shit just happens.

I guess the level of disappointment is proportional to the level of anticipation. And that equates to some kind of balance. I guess.

So, what I’m going to do tonight is list the things I am looking forward to. Because really, even given the fact that my holiday stretches out in front of me with no concrete plans and/or possible quarantine, there is an enormous amount to look forward to –

• Time with the boy. All time with the boy is wonderful. Physical longing though is a whoooole other thing to out and out longing. And I’m not talking about the obvious here. Just so you know. There’s a lot you take for granted though, without even realizing you’re taking it for granted. S’all I’m saying.
• The crazy week in January where I see the National on Monday, Arcade Fire on Tuesday, the National on Wednesday, Spoon on Thursday, and Joanna Newsom on Friday. Nuts, right? Nuts but AWESOME.
• Laneway Festival and all associated side shows. I’d list them here, but I might pass out with the awesome.
• Even giving the uncertainty of Things, another week of no work. And regardless of how that week or so is filled, it will NOT be filled with WORK. And that in itself is cause for celebration.
• And you know what? The future in general is exciting. Get me over the next few weeks unscathed, and into 2008, and I reckon I don’t really KNOW how potentially exciting the future is. And that makes me feel good.

I might add Christmas to this list tomorrow. We’ll see I guess.

And yeah I get that some of this post is a bit cryptic, but whatareyagonnado. It’s late. I’m tired. So I’m going to leave you with some lyrics because really the song Elijah from the Mountain Goats album The Coroners Gambit is AMAZING and YOU ALL SHOULD GO FIND IT AND LISTEN TO IT IMMEDIATELY. If not for the jaw-droppingly amazing lyrics, then for the complete humanity and vulnerability in Darnielle’s voice. So go listen. Now now now.

Set the table
For three extra places
One for me
One for your doubts
And one for God

Let the incense burn in every room
Feel the fullness of time in the empty tomb
Feel the future kicking in your womb

I’m coming home

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