Junoesque embodied

Sound, sound the clarion, fill the fife!
To all the sensual world proclaim,
One crowded hour of glorious life
Is worth an age without a name.

The poem ‘Answer’ – Sir Walter Scott

You know, I knew I’d heard the title of that song before (YES I KNOW, I will shut up about it soon I promise). It’s just that songs with literary references make me swoon.

It’s not even 11 o’clock yet and I’m ready for bed. It’s a new thing I’m trying – bed before midnight. So far it has meant a bit of staring at the ceiling, but I’m guessing that will get better if I try and reinforce the pattern.

I had an email from Tara today. It made me sad, because she was so nervous about telling us she’s not coming home until March 1. I’m fed up, and disappointed she didn’t contact me, but I don’t want her to feel like she can’t call. She must have asked me online more than 3 times today if I thought Mum would be mad. She has had a shitty couple of days – panic about missing the flight, disappointment about not coming home, coping with Stewart who is apparently really ill, phoning insurance companies etc. I guess the positive is, if this experience hasn’t taught her something, nothing will.

So I saw on Lateline just now that Peter Costello is supporting the RU486 bill. This is interesting, and the first amount of real sense I have ever heard from him. The experts (the TGA in this case) should make the decision about an issue such as this, not a politician who is coloured, consciously or otherwise, by personal opinion and experience. They say it’s about the health risks involved with the drug – if this were really the case I fail to see why the TGA shouldn’t make the decision. Most of the dialogue in the media seems to be about the moral implications. I’m flummoxed as to why we’re even having this debate – didn’t we already go through the whole pro choice V pro life thing? Didn’t we already decide that a woman’s choice was her own? Any debate that threatens that premise is a step backward.

It scares me to death that the Christian right wing is gaining more and more power in this country, politically, financially and socially. Why aren’t people seeing the correlation between here at what’s happening in the US, and feel scared too? People are generally so disunited with themselves, their lives and the people around them that they grasp for anything that gives them some hope or depth of being. The church, particularly this new brand of Pentecostal Christianity, prays on this. They set up ‘life centres’ in these large sprawling house farms they’re building outside the city, and people are filling the seats in droves.

If we could somehow find a sense of community again people wouldn’t need to look for meaning elsewhere. They work their whole life to get the material possessions they think they want, and when they get there they just can’t understand why there’s still emptiness inside.

And the irony astounds me – the same people who pity me because they think I’m ‘lost’, are the same ones looking constantly for guidance. I may not have a stellar sense of direction, but I sure as hell know where I am in the spiritual sense, and where I’m going for that matter. And that certainty seems to make them uncomfortable.

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